Today I got to play TotalCARnage with my daughter. It is a
dexterity based car combat game. The key
feature is WYSIWYG resolution. If
terrain falls or is knocked over, it stays that way. Instead of using rulers and dice all
resolution is completed using a “flick” mechanic. It is designed to be quick, dirty, and
decisive.
The Forces
Purple People Eaters
They are a fierce cannibal warband driving purple cars.
Standard Vehicle (Flames)
Machine Gun
Hits: 5
45 Points
Standard Vehicle (Classic Car)
Cannon
Hits: 5
35 Points
Total= 80 Points
Truk Police
A band of wasteland do-gooders in trucks
Standard Vehicle (Green)
Cannon
Hits: 5
35 Points
Heavy Vehicle (Black)
Cannon
Hits: 6
45 Points
Mission: Convoy
Attack
The attackers sets-up
terrain. The defender is set-up with one vehicle touching the board edge. All
other vehicles are in a line facing the opposite board edge. 1 of the
defender’s vehicles is the “objective” vehicles as chosen by the defender. This
time it is the Black Truck of the Truck police.
The attackers are placed touching
any board edge. If the objective vehicle escapes the board the defender wins,
if not the attacker wins.
The Green truck is in
front of the Black truck facing the long way down a 6ft by 2 ft table. The terrain is wasteland terrain with some
rocks and dunes. There is no clear way
down the entire board without hitting terrain.
The Purple People Eaters have the flames car on the opposite short edge,
while the Old Car is coming in on the left board edge behind a rock about half
way up the board.
Turn 1:
The Attackers go first,
and it is the Purple People Eaters. A
really poor initial flick sends the Flames car careening into a rock at a 90
degree angle from where he started!
Woops! Down 3 Hits all ready!
The Green Truck rumbles
forward just short of the rock half way up the board. The Old Car barely moves and gets ready to
try and ambush the trucks as they pass.
The Black Truck moves out,
but is overzealous and accidentally rams the Green Truck in the back! Green Truck is down to 2 hits, and Black is
down to 5.
Bad driving all around!
Turn 2:
The Purple Flames car
backs-up, and the Green truck rushes forward and clips a dune for one more
hit. He fires his cannon and hits the
Purple Flame car, both are now down to 1 hit.
The Old Purple Car speeds
out after the Green Truck and fires his cannon to finish him off. However, his shots fall short. The Black Trucks moves up, but is does not
have a good shot as he comes up to the Old Car.
Turn 3:
The Old Car fires point
blank into the Black Truck and follows it with a powerful ram! The Black Truck is down to 1 hit, and the Old
Car has 4 left. Not good for the Truck
police.
The Green Truck fires his
cannon at the Purple Flames car and misses.
He then backs-up to avoid getting fired at. The Purple Flames car turns and drives to
cut-off the Black Truck’s route.
The Black Truck fired on
the Purple Flames Car, but missed. He
then rolled up closer to it to try to get to the board edge.
Turn 4:
The Purple Old Car rammed
the back of the Black Truck and hit it with a close range Cannon shot for 4
hits of total damage. It is at -3 hits,
not enough to explode. However, the
Truck Police have lost the game. All
other actions are irrelevant so we call it a match.
Conclusion:
A quick and bloody match
finished. Some poor initial driving
really caused issues this game. Lots of
ramming and collisions this game! I am
surprised the Green Truck and Purple Flame Cars made it without getting
immobilized.
Mission 2: Race
to the Finish
The defender places
terrain and attacker chooses a short board edge. Defender deploys anywhere on
the edge, and the attacker is then placed anywhere on the same board edge. The
first gang to exit a vehicle on the opposite board edge wins. Purple People Eaters are the attacker.
In this one, we said that
the two sides are racing to a settlement.
If the Cannibal Purple People Eaters get there first, it is time for a
banquet. If the Truck Police get there
first the townsfolk are saved!
Turn 1:
The Old Car goes first and sails up the board and past a
bunch of terrain. The Green Truck
pursues and fires with his cannon, but misses.
The Purple Flames Car chases and rear rams the Green Truck! 2 hits on Green and 4 left on Purple
Flame.
Turn 2:
The Purple Flames car opens fire with his Machine Gun and
immobilizes the Green Truck. However, he
was so focused on shooting that he crashed head first into a mountain! 1 Hit left.
The Black truck raced ahead, and came perilously close to
fall off the edge of the board! The Old
Car was more carefully and pulled ahead, but had no targets to shoot at.
Turn 3:
The Purple Flame Car backs away from the mountain he hit
to go around it. The Black Truck makes
for the gap past the dunes. The Old
Purple Car shoots him with his cannon and takes him down one hit, and slowly
pursues. The Black Truck is in the lead!
Turn 4:
The Old Purple Car goes to ram the Black Truck hard, but
misses and ends up flying off the edge of the board. Ka-boom!
The Black Truck carefully drives to the edge of the board and past the
sand dunes. He has won the race!
Conclusion:
The Truck Police have managed to get to the settlement
before the cannibals and saved the day!
Hip-hip Hooray!
We then started to play about 6-8 more games that I didn’t
bother recording because we were having too much fun. We even played a few three-on-three games
with my wife too. There was much mayhem,
crashing, exploding, and merriment.
Final Thoughts:
Another couple of quick, fun games completed. An entire campaign could probably be played
in an evening even with a few more cars per side. This would make a great family night game as
the rules are super easy and even a novice to wargames can pick them up
fast. Plus, it was a hoot smashing cars
together.
I need to get to the store and find some more cheap cars
to add to me collection so we can play it with even more crashing and smashing! My family particularly enjoyed the Race to the
Finish scenario. With more cars and on
a 6x4 table that would get crazy fun!
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