We have a few traditions in my house, and one of those traditions is to play a game of Blood Bowl around the time of the Super Bowl. Today's exhibition match is a continuation of that proud tradition. I am glad my Skumgrod was available for this one. Despite having the video game version, for the Super Bowl I always insist on using the miniatures. I broke out the Winter themed board, and we randomly determined that for the game we were going to use the Black Guards Dark Elf team vs. the Nottingham Nobles Human team.
Let's get to the Blood Bowl! I did not document every single thing that happened in the game, but tried to keep it close enough for a narrative to form. Let's turn it over to our hosts, Lord Summervale and his co-host Mad Johan.
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Lord Summervale: Welcome all to Bludwieser Blood Bowl Championship weekend events! In addition to the "Big Game" Bludweiser also sponsors many exhibition matches to get your mouth watering for more Blood Bowl! There are skills competitions, exhibition games, and star player meet-and-greets from all levels of the game, intent on celebrating the Greatest Game in the Olde World! It is an epic celebration of Nuffle and all things Blood Bowl!
You can tune into the big game Bludweiser Blood Bowl on Cabalvision later this weekend. However, today on Cabalvision IV we are bringing you the best action from these celebratory exhibition games. Each Conference, Division and League at all levels of the game have sent some of their ....errrr..... best to represent themselves here. Altdorf is flooded with players and fans alike!
Right now, we will be featuring the Deep North- Southern Division exhibition action! Today we will be featuring the Black Guards led by their team captain Mori-Thai the Velvet Crush versus their division rivals the Nottingham Nobles led by their throwing captain Rick Priestley!
As always, I am joined in the booth by my .... err..... trusty companion and great Blood Bowl mind, Mad Johan.
Mad Johan: Thanks for getting me out of the stocks in time for the match, Summervale. I really need to lay-off the Bugman's Brew before the show starts. As we all know, the Notthingham Nobles are a founding member of the Deep North- Southern Division. Some say, that the entire league is bankrolled by the Nobles just so they have some other teams to play Blood Bowl with. I mean, Sigmar knows they aren't good enough to make it in a real division!
Lord Summervale: You know our contract expressly forbids us from talking about that Johan. So, let me gracefully pivot! What can we expect to see today?
Mad Johan: Probably a lot of mediocre Blood Bowl! The Nobles only have two Blitzers on their team, a far cry from the rest of the skilled divisions where the orthodoxy of Nuffle seems to be 4 Blitzers. That means, they are relying on their Lineman to do a lot of the work. I guess that's what happens when you are using out-of-the-box team building in your league.
Lord Summervale: Mori-Thai seems to think that her Black Guards are a competitive match-up for the Nobles. What do you think?
Mad Johan: I think Dark Elf teams led by a couple of Witch Elves gets more people in the stands than going up against a team of Orks. To be honest, neither team is that good, and both seem to be hoping to level up their audience by being here. We have seen them play, they do tend to be a rather violent team, and less finesse than one might expect from a Dark Elf team.
Lord Summervale: Well, it looks like both teams are lining up and getting ready to play. The ref sends the commemorative coin into the air..... and it looks like the Nobles have elected to kick-off the ball to the Dark Elves.
Mad Johan: An interesting choice, as Dark Elves have a reputation for scoring early and often, not that the Black Guards can manage it.
Lord Summervale: The Nobles have their back-up Thrower, Andy Chambers in the dug-out. He seems to be signaling plays into Rick. Meanwhile, the Black Guard have a back-up runner, Urlieth Val-Drakken riding the bench.
Mad Johan: Let's play BLOOD BOWL!
The Nobles in their Purple and White vs. the Black Guard in their Blues and Lizard scales |
Lord Summervale: Raz-al-slam is back to receive the kick and...... Boom! The game is underway! A terrible kick-off that goes out-of-bounds. The Refs toss it in to Raz-al-slam and the game gets going.
Mad Johan: Perhaps an omen for what we are about to see out there today?
Lord Summervale: The Runner moves up and the Black Guards quickly form a cage around the ball carrier. However, they shift from the right hash to the left with a display of elvish speed.
Mad Johan: Those dirty Elves are trixie!
Lord Summervale: There is a scrum near the line of scrimmage with a lot of pushing and shoving up close.
Mad Johan: Bang! The Black Guards are the first to lose a player there.
Lord Summervale: Looks like ... Jaq the Knife is unconscious. The Nobles blitzers are moving in and...
Mad Johan: Boom! Kurounous the Dreaded a Black Guard blitzer lays out the Noble's blitzer Mat Ward cold!
Lord Summervale: Mori-Thai is leading the onslaught and manages to punch an opening though the Nobles' lines. Raz-Al-Slam makes his move and bursts past the Nobles with a fancy spin move and a burst of speed! The Nobles' Gav Thorpe, a catcher' tries to catch-up to him but it is too little too late!
Mad Johan: Touchdown for the Black Guard! Plus, they did not leave much time left in the half for the Nobles to score back.
Lord Summervale: Indeed Johan. Plus, it looks like Mat Ward is going to stay off the pitch as the Nobles set-up for their chance with the ball. Back-up Thrower Andy Chambers is out there with Rick Priestley.
Mad Johan: Hoepfully for the Nobles, Ward will be back for the second half.
Lord Summervale: The kick is up and it goes straight to Nobles' Catcher Alessio Cavatorre, who quickly hauls it in.
Mad Johan: Pretty sure that wasn't the plan!
Lord Summervale: The Nobles don't have much time left on the clock so they get to work! Gav Thorpe tries to get into the Black Guard backfield, but is brought down by the Dark Elf Blitzer Darveck the Flayer. However, Andy Chambers delivers a key block to Korounous the Dreaded, it gives Alessio Cavatorre enough space and he dances around the defenders and cuts back through the line. He is sprinting deep into the Dark Elf backfield!
Mad Johan: There is no one around to stop him!
Lord Summervale: Just the clock, as the half comes to a close before he could score. The crowd is very upset! I guess there are plenty of Nobles fans in the audience.
Mad Johan: A tough break, but the Nobles start the second half with the ball. Both sides have shown they can get to the end zone.
Lord Summervale: With that, it is time for a break from our sponsors! Gullotine Razors, a close shave everytime you use one. Let's go back to the Cabalvision IV Studios for a quick update from around the league!
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Lord Summervale: Welcome back to the second half of this Bludweiser Blood Bowl Weekend exhibition match between the Dark Elf Black Guards and the Human Nottingham Nobles. The Nobles are trailing by 1 at the half, but will receive the ball this half.
Mad Johan: If they want to get back into this game, it is now or never!
Lord Summervale: The Nobles ended the first half just shy of the goal line due to time. Can they get there again?
Mad Johan: I am sure the Black Guard watched the crystal ball replay on that and learned a lot from it. Don't expect it to be that easy this time for the Nobles.
Lord Summervale: Let's go down to the field and get into the action. The Nobles set-up with their Catchers out-wide, and their throwers set to receive. The Black Guards use their Blitzers and Witch Elves to cover the wings, and their Runner Urlieth Val-Drakken as a roving safety in the back-field.
Mad Johan: The Nobles will need to eat up as much of the clock as possible and then score to force an overtime.
Lord Summervale: The kick is up, and the touchback goes to Rick Priestly, the Thrower in the back field for the Nobles. Right away, the Nobles start to move, with Gav Thorpe stepping through the Dark Elf line and going deep into the backfield. His counter-part is less successful as the lead block from a returned Mat Ward only pushes the Black Guard defender and fails to open a lane.
Mad Johan: He is deep, but exposed. Ker-runch!
Lord Summervale: Oof! In a blow to the Nobles plans, Korounous the Dreaded lives up to his name and flattens Gav Thorpe with Val-Drakken's aid. Thorpe is not going to be getting up from that hit until tomorrow!
Mad Johan: Cavatoree is not doing much better, as Mori-Thai works around the edge and flattens him with a hit. He's still in the game though!
Lord Summervale: Gav Thorpe's sacrifice though opened up space on the far side wing, and the Nobles took advantage of it. The formed a cage and pushed in along the edge. The Black Guard struggled to respond, as many of their players are tied up at the line.
Mad Johan: Cavatorre managed to get up and sneak across the field and into the end zone. He looks open, and he is waving to get Priestley's attention.
Lord Summervale: I think the Nobles star thrower sees him now! He goes back to throw, and Val-Drakken jumps to intercept. Priestley manages to bomb it past the Black Guard defender and it is up, up, up..... this is a long throw!
Mad Johan: TOUCHDOWN!!!!
Lord Summervale: Oh my, what a pass! What a catch! That puts the Nobles back in the game!
Mad Johan: They managed a quick touchdown, but I think they may have left too much time on the clock!
Lord Summervale: The two teams reset for a kick-off. The Nobles try a corer blitz on the Near side, but it doesn't make much progress or open a lane. Urlieth Van-Drakken picks up the ball easily. The two sides clash at the line, and The Widow Ariethial uses her Frenzy ability to open a gap on the far side of the field.
Mad Johan: The speed of a Dark Elf was needed to get through that gap!
Lord Summervale: Indeed! The Black Guards are hitting hard and stunning several of the Nobles' players. That is hampering their ability to respond to the Dark Elf break through!
Mad Johan: Mori-Thai proves why they call her the Velvet Crush after absolutely dismantling the Noble's Blitzer Jervis Johnson!
Lord Summervale: With only a few minutes left on the clock, the Black Guard Runner Urlieth Can-Drakken walks untouched into the End Zone. Touchdown Black Guards!
Mad Johan: It would take a miracle for the Nobles to win now.
Lord Summervale: Indeed! The two teams get back for the kick-off. It is a high kick, but goes out of the back of the end zone. This touch back means that Rick Priestley is given the ball and the game begins again!
Mad Johan: A missed block at the line costs the Nobles dearly. You can't make a basic mistake like that. This is crunch time!
Lord Summervale: Priestley dumps the ball to Cavatorre, but there is no path forward and he is held at the line. The clock winds down, and this game ends in a rather dull finish.
Lord Summervale: Johan, who do you think were the Bloodwieser MVPs of the game?
Mad Johan: Well, going back to the game notes it looks like for the Nobles it is a no-brainer. Rick is the star-thrower for a reason. He was the one who kept them in the game. No Rick, and the Nobles are in rough shape this game.
On the winning side of the ball, Kurounous the Dreaded was all-over the field and making his presence known, especially in the first half. Mora-Thai was similar. However, Urlieth Van-Drakken scored the go ahead point, so you have to consider that long running play. I am going with Van-Drakken for the MVP this time.
Lord Summervale: Well, that looks like the ball game for us here. I will turn you back to the Cabalvision IV tower for an update of all the exciting events going on this Blood Bowl Cup weekend! Remember, if you need to cut it close, Guillotine Razors are a cut above!
Mad Johan: I have seen worse exhibition games.....
Lord Summervale: This is Lord Summervale and Johan signing off!
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